History Repeats
by Ducky10
Summary: When history repeats itself, can Logan prove that he's learned from past mistakes? And how will Veronica cope with more tragedy?
1. Unnatural Sleep

**History Repeats**

Disclaimer: I do not own Veronica Mars or any of the characters.

Author's Note: Tell me what you think! I'll try to update this one soon…I have a plan in motion. I take both positive and (constructively) negative feedback!

"Where is she" Logan demanded as he pushed through the front door and all but shoved Keith away as he walked into the house.

"Logan, she's asle…" but Keith was too slow in his response, and Logan had already barged into Veronica's room. Keith walked in to see Logan brushing the hair off her obviously tear-stained face. She was snoring slightly; Logan assumed from a stuffy nose brought on by incessant crying. Her face was pale, but she seemed (as astounding as it was to Logan) to be sleeping deeply.

"I'm surprised she's sleeping so soundly," Logan mumbled. He thought back to the night before, which they spent wide-awake, while he listened to her sob and hyperventilate over the phone.

"It's not quite as natural of a sleep as you might think, Logan. I cracked some sleeping pills into her water at dinner. She had to get some sleep and it was the only way I could get her to calm down."

"She's going to kill you when she wakes up, you know," Logan said while keeping his gaze on Veronica and affectionately stroking her hair.

"When she can see straight again she'll understand. Until then, I don't mind taking some heat. It's better than the devastation I see now…" Keith paused for a moment to look at Veronica. He took a deep breath, "Look Logan, you will never hear me repeat this, and I'm only saying it because I know she'll be out for the next 8 hours, but stay with her here tonight. I don't want my baby to wake up alone, and I have to go check on Alicia…"

"With all due respect, Mr. Mars, I wasn't planning on leaving." And although he meant his response, Logan still couldn't believe Keith Mars trusted him enough with his daughter to ask him to stay the night with her.

He only wished it was under different circumstances.


	2. Battle with Composure

**History Repeats**

Disclaimer: I still don't own VM or any of its characters. Let me know how you like it!

Even under three layers of covers she seemed cold. Logan could feel her shaking, sedated through sleeping pills though she was. He knew better than most how unable Veronica was to let go of things, even in sleep.

He wasn't sure she was going to get though it this time, the grief, which he knew would begin to gnaw at her. It never ceased to amaze him that for someone who spends her days proving the assumed guilty innocent, she was never able to do such a favor for herself. He knows the guilt she holds for Lily's death, the bus crash and even this, as irrational and misguided, as it seems. No much how much evidence she had stacked against others, including himself, she was always her own prime suspect. Everything always was and still remains somehow her fault. He doesn't have a clue how she copes. As he wiped away stray tears from Veronica's face, he shuttered realizing that he was about to get yet another front row seat to her so-called "coping".

The call came last night just as Logan was about to go to bed. He and Dick were finally on speaking terms after Cassidy, "as long as Ronnie's name stays out of conversation". Logan was about ready to abandon the friendship, but Veronica insisted that Dick needed someone, and although she wished it didn't have to be Logan, she knew that he was pretty much all Dick had left. As part of their 're-bonding" time, Dick convinced Logan that what they needed was a trip to Vegas. Logan agreed to go half hoping that Dick would find his calling among the slutty showgirls and casinos and decide to "shack up" in Nevada for a while allowing Logan to travel back to Neptune minus one slightly annoying, albeit loyal sidekick.

Logan had just made it back to his hotel room and was expecting her call. They had to set up times when they could get in touch seeing as cell phones aren't allowed in the casinos. He wasn't sure where Dick went, but Logan had had just about enough of the Vegas life. Living his life surrounded by fake people and liars didn't leave him with much of an appetite for bluffers and shady dealers with tricks up their sleeves.

Enter Veronica…Logan didn't understand how that worked either.

When the phone rang, Logan didn't even look at the ID. He had few callers these days, and with Dick gallivanting in cell phone restricted areas that left precious few people who would be calling.

"Hey baby," he answered smoothly while looking at his watch. It was 1 am on the dot. "You called not one second past our scheduled time, careful or I'll start to think you miss me or something". He waited to hear her bite back a response. He had been waiting to hear her voice all night, the cool banter with a hint of underlying affection. Veronica has a uniquely distinctive tone to her voice that Logan can't get enough of. Luckily for him, his Ronnie is a talker. Which is why he was concerned when she didn't automatically start with an effortless comment about sequenced strippers with their legs in the air.

"Ronnie, you there?" He asked, figuring she must have just put down the phone for a second or gotten distracted by something in her line of vision. When he heard her voice, calm and oddly dull, lacking its usual vibrancy, he immediately began packing his clothes.

"Hey Logan" she sniffled. He could hear her trying to compose herself, her breath hitching in the distance as in his mind he could see her turning her mouth away from the phone to hide the evidence of her breakdown.

"What happened?" Logan asked, in a serious voice without hesitation. He always preferred bad news to be delivered quickly…like ripping off a band-aid. Still, his stomach dropped and his head began to pound with the idea that something else had gone wrong. While he may have had plenty of experience learning the best way to hear bad news, in the end, his most valuable lesson was simply that regardless of the delivery, it still sucked.

There was a slight pause on the other end of the phone. Logan could tell that Veronica was trying her best to control her voice and keep it together. Still, he was amazed with the clear, piercing tone of her voice as she managed to choke out,

"Wallace is dead."

Before she lost her battle with Composure and dissolved into gut-wrenching sobs.


	3. Going it Alone

**History Repeats**

Disclaimer: Still don't own VM or any of its characters

Author's Note: I'm not such a fan of this chapter. It didn't come out quite the way I imagined it to. I'll try and get another one written tonight if I can finish my work. I teach second grade and lesson plans need to come before chapter three. Let me know how you like this…I hope it all makes sense!

Logan's not sure when he fell asleep, or for how long, but it was still dark out when he woke up. Not the pitch-black darkness he arrived in, but more of an early morning glow, when everything is still and calm. He turned to look at Veronica and was somehow not so surprised to find her missing. Upon closer inspection he found her sitting at her computer, head in her hands staring at the screen.

"Hey" he said gently, "how long have you been up?"

She turned to look at him slowly, still cradling her head in her hands. "I'm not sure," she responded, her voice hoarse and quiet. "An hour maybe, I don't remember ever falling asleep. I think Dad must have slipped me a sleeping pill or something, I have so much to do, I know I wouldn't have gone to sleep on my own."

"What do you have to do? Can't it wait? Veronica you need to take some time to yourse…"

"I have to write his eulogy, Logan. Alicia asked me last night. She said since I am…was" she turned her head away from him and finished the sentence facing the wall, "since I was his best friend, he would want me to be the one to deliver it." He listened to her try to catch her breath and watched her muscles stiffen in an effort to control herself. He knew telling her it was ok to be upset was a lost cause, and furthermore, he was afraid to see what "letting go" would entail at this point.

"Look Logan, I know I asked you to come back, and I really do need you here with me, but I'm going to need some time here," she turned to him and he looked at her with a critical eye. Her face was shadowed and her eyes were dark and bloodshot. She wasn't hysterical, but tears seemed to be falling down her face at their own pace, and she had pretty much given up trying to wipe them away.

"I'll do whatever you need, Veronica. Anything" he wanted to take the pain away. God this was going to kill him, to see her in so much agony. "Come here, Ronnie" and he stood up to take her in his arms and was surprised when she pulled away.

"No Logan," she squeaked. "This is what I'm talking about. I need to stay strong right now. If you hold me, I'll lose it and I need to write this eulogy and be prepared" she was losing her composure once again but struggled valiantly to regain it, "I need to be prepared to deliver it tomorrow. I know you want to help me, but I only know how to do this alone. It's the only way I've dealt with this before and I know it will force me to hold it together and get through tomorrow. So please, just let me work. I'm not asking you to leave, but please give me space."

"I'll give you all the space you need, Veronica. I won't touch you and I'll go sit in the other room. But understand this," he walked up and put his large hand on her cheek, "You are not alone, and I will not let you go through this alone. Not this time, not ever again."

He kissed her on the forehead and walked out of the room, shutting the door softly behind him. It killed him leaving her in tears, and hearing the poorly concealed sniffles and hiccups, but he knew it's what she wanted. He could even understand it was what she needed. He knew she felt like she needed to be strong right now, to pay her final respects to Wallace. He also knew that when it was all over, she would allow herself time to fall apart.

All the same, in case that time came earlier than she expected, he wasn't going to move from his spot…perched right in front of her bedroom door, leaning into the wall to hear if she started to get more upset. He was ok leaving her alone for the time being, while she was holding herself together (albeit barely). But he was not about to let her fall apart alone.


	4. Bad Luck

**Veronica Mars**

Disclaimer: I don't own VM or its characters

Lucky you all, two updates in one night…that means I expect double the reviews!

In a city where residents meet dramatic ends on a regular basis, it seems Wallace somehow ran out of luck in an entirely non-mysterious way. Perhaps that's what Veronica had the hardest time understanding. Murders, the bus crash, jumping off bridges, jumping off hotels, explosions on a plane…these are not pleasant endings, but ones where there is a culprit or catalyst and if Veronica is lucky, a mystery. A mystery means she can put off the grief, push aside feelings of desperation and pain and focus on solving a puzzle. A needed distraction for a girl who could no longer name the number of people she'd lost on one hand.

Wallace's death left no room for question…not that Veronica didn't try to find signs of foul play. She was dying for someone to blame, somewhere to place all the anger and guilt she was feeling. She was sure his death had something to do with her. Clearly she pissed someone off or over-stepped a boundary on a case, and someone went after Wallace in an attempt to destroy her. There is no way that an 18-year-old boy could just die out of the blue for no reason. Not a boy connected with Veronica Mars.

So immediately after receiving the news, after her few moments of shocked silence and intense shaking, she pushed past her concerned father and drove directly to the police station. She had to get answers and her father, who for the third time now delivered the news of a friend's death, was too adamant that it was basically, for lack of anything better, "bad luck." Sheriff Lamb was no better. Although in a more condescending tone, he assured Veronica that of course all steps would be taken to be 100 sure, but from the looks of it, Wallace's death was absolutely nobody's fault. Veronica left the police station in the same state she entered it. Frazzled and in a hurry, she knew better than to let hot clues cool off. She got right back into her car, ignored the falsely concerned remarks from Lamb that she wasn't in the right condition to be driving, and took off towards the hospital. Thirty minutes later, she was still trying to bargain with the people at the morgue to let her in.

It was no use, but an autopsy was pending. Then Veronica would be sure, and she knew she'd wipe that condescending smirk off Lamb's face, that her father would nod his head and say, "you were right, sweetheart." She knew she'd prove them all wrong and that Wallace's death would not have been "bad luck", but a mystery she could solve. She's not sure how this was going to help the situation in the long run, but it was a distraction.

As soon as Keith told her the news that Wallace had collapsed on a basketball court, Veronica knew it wasn't a "freak accident". She knew there was a reason for it; she knew it had been preplanned. So when the phone rang well into the evening, following the autopsy, she had already imagined the conversation she would have with Alicia Fennel, who had promised to call with the results. She was sure they would have found a poison or chemical in his body, which shouldn't have been there, she had already rehearsed the reaction she would give. Which is why when Alicia called and delivered the news, she handed the phone to her father in silence and decided it was time to call Logan.

"Veronica," Alicia started, obviously struggling to get through the conversation, "the hospital just called and they finished the autopsy. Wallace died of a heart attack" Alicia began crying, "apparently, he had a heart defect that hadn't been detected, and he died playing basketball."

As Veronica walked into her bedroom she found it more difficult to breathe. She pulled herself together the best she could and picked up her cell phone. This wasn't a mystery she could solve and she didn't know how to cope. It was time for Logan to come home.


	5. Diversion Failed

**History Repeats**

Disclaimer: Don't own VM or characters.

PLEASE review…close to 2,000 hits to this story and only 22 reviews. Do you like it? LET ME KNOW!

"Veronica," Logan called while softly knocking on the door. "What do you want to eat for lunch?" He had left her alone for hours, but it was going on noon now and she still hadn't come out of the room. Keith had called a little bit ago and asked Logan to see if he could get Veronica to eat anything. He mentioned she hardly touched dinner the night before, and was beginning to wonder when her last solid meal was.

"Really Logan, I'm not hungry," she opened the door and leaned against the frame. Obviously lacking the energy, or desire to stand up straight.

"Come on, Ronnie. You've gotta eat something, I'll make anything you want."

"I said no, Logan. Thank you for offering, I know you're worried, but I'm fine, seriously."

"Look, I know you're not hungry but I'm telling you it's time to eat. You haven't had anything in hours, hell probably days, and if you are going to stand in front of all those people tomorrow and deliver a eulogy without passing out you're going to eat." He didn't want to be quite so rough about it, but she had to eat something.

Veronica looked a little surprised that he snapped at her.

"Fine, I'll have a grilled cheese. Thanks, Logan. I have to get back to work. I think I'm about done."

"Do you want me to read it?"

"That's ok, you really don't need to," she started fidgeting with a splinter on the doorframe. "But, umm, I wanted to ask," her gaze moved to the floor and he watched her begin to turn red.

"Veronica, I've already told you that I'll do anything…" Logan started, trying to make whatever she was going to ask a little easier.

"I wanted to know if you'd go to the funeral with me. I want Dad to be able to sit with Alicia, and I know Mac will be there but," Logan stopped her and ran his hand up and down her arms comfortingly.

"Of course I'll be there Veronica. I know Wallace might not have been my best friend, but he and I did spend some time together this past year. He was a good person…and he was a loyal friend to you when those of us who should have been weren't. I owe it to him to be there. Besides, I already told you Veronica, I won't let you do this alone."

Logan left to go make the grilled cheese as Veronica managed to choke out a "thank you" and turned to finish up the eulogy.

This time she left her door open.

When Logan walked back to Veronica's room he was pleased to see that her door was open. He walked in with the grilled cheese in hand but instead of seeing her scrunched over the computer as he had imagined, he saw the closed laptop with a piece of paper laying on top. He figured she must have finished the eulogy, and so he scanned the room for Veronica. He almost jumped when he turned and saw her staring into her closet.

"Hey, what'cha doin'?" She turned to him and as she brushed some hair away from her face, he could see that she was shaking.

"I'm trying to find something to wear tomorrow…I um, I" her voice was starting to shake as badly as her hands were. Logan put down the plate and started to walk towards her.

"I hadn't thought about what to wear, and I'm done with the eulogy now," her breath started to hitch and the tears began again. "I just need to concentrate on something because every time I stop thinking about what I need to do I just start to melt down" she was speaking really fast now. "And I don't have time to fall apart, I just, I can't let mysel…."

"Veronica…"

"No Logan, I can't let myself st st start this,"

"Ronnie," Logan croaked. This was harder than it was over the phone, listening to her fall apart was one thing, but watching it happen…

"I can't" she covered her face with her hands and started to back away but Logan pulled her shaking hands away from her face and pulled her into his arms as she started to sob.

"oh god, Wallace…oh god" Logan held on to her tighter as they lowered to the ground her body convulsing with pain. "Oh god" she was gasping for air now and Logan had absolutely nothing to say.

"Just breathe, Veronica. Just concentrate on breathing. I'm here" he was stroking her hair and back trying to get her to calm down a little.

"Not Wallace, Logan…why? What did I do to deserve this? Oh no…make this stop," he held on to her as she tried to take in a breath. "God this hurts, Logan. Oh God, Wallace…"

"You don't deserve this, Ronnie. You don't and I won't let you blame yourself. Just go ahead and cry, baby, you're allowed to fall apart. I'm not going anywhere. Just breathe, Veronica."

"I'm sorry, Logan," she stuttered out, "I hate this, I.." she couldn't finish. She really hated that Logan was in this position again, dealing with her while she broke down.

"Veronica, I know I'm like a broken record here, but I don't know if you're hearing me. You're not going to do this alone. I'm not leaving you alone and if that means we're going to sit here with you crying on my shoulder, I don't care. I blew it with Lily and with Meg," he continued to calmly stroke her back and paused as she caught her breath. "And I'm sorry for that, but I'm not going to blow it this time. I'm here for you whether you are composed or a sobbing mess. You lost Wallace, but you're not on your own now, not ever again, Veronica."

Logan was rewarded with a slightly calmer Veronica who was now just quietly trying to catch her breath with her head in his lap. She had stopped shaking and her muscles, which had been so tight a few minutes ago seemed to be relaxing.

"One more thing, Ronnie. It might be cold, but don't think you're getting out of eating that grilled cheese."

"Damn," Veronica managed, "diversion failed."


	6. Sleepless Nights

**History Repeats**

Disclaimer: I don't own Veronica Mars of the characters associated with it.

_Authors Note: 3000 hits and 26 reviews…motivation will drop if interest doesn't stay up. If you're not liking the story, let me know what you'd like to see improve_

When Keith returned later that afternoon and found that Veronica looked no worse off than she did when he left, Keith decided not to make a big deal if Logan didn't leave immediately. By 9:00, Keith had all but passed out on the sofa and decided to call it an early night. He warned Logan that he would just be in his room, and not to try anything "funny". Then he kissed his daughter goodnight, told her to get some sleep because tomorrow was going to be a long day, and turned in.

Three hours later, Logan and Veronica were laying completely still her room listening to the sound of muffled voices and car alarms drift in from outside. Her head was on his shoulder and he could tell by her breathing that she wasn't asleep. Logan knew she wasn't interested in having a conversation as clearly as he knew that neither of them were going to get much sleep. She seemed content to bore a hole in the ceiling with her eyes and he was happy just being able to hold her.

Ever since her breakdown earlier in the afternoon, Veronica had been oddly quiet. Not in a bad, avoiding way, but just in a sullen, mourning haze. Logan was actually rather pleased to see it, because as far as he understood, it meant that she was at least beginning to deal with the whole thing instead of literally working around it. But just because he was happy to see her dealing with it didn't mean it was easy, and tonight was no exception. As the seconds ticked to minutes and into hours, Logan remained as wide- awake as Veronica. At times, listening to her casually sniffle, or covertly wipe away a brief bout of wayward tears, he had no idea how to help her. At one point he reminded her that tomorrow was going to be a rough day, and that she should get some sleep. Veronica nodded and told him that she'd keep that in mind. It wasn't until well past 4 that she finally dozed off, and he knew it wasn't a deep sleep either. He's not sure when he fell asleep, but by 6 he felt her jerk awake, and carefully untangle from his embrace. He knew she was already embarrassed from all the sobbing she had done in front of him, so he pretended not to hear her quiet crying as she padded off to the bathroom.

He reminded himself that this would get easier. To be honest, it wasn't much consolation at this point.

When Logan opened his eyes again, he turned to see Veronica dressed in a conservative, black outfit reading over her eulogy. She looked tired, but strong…in a way he only knew Veronica to be able to pull off. He knew she had steeled herself for this, that she had blocked off the range of emotions she was feeling to be able to get through today and all the suffering that was sure to go along with it. When she looked up at him he could see that she was not going to give in to the agony she was feeling. He looked into her eyes and softly grazed her face with his hands as he walked into the bathroom. Logan knew better than to break the silence, he knew she was barely even aware of his presence. Today Wallace held her full attention, and Logan was not about to steal her focus away from him.


	7. Outstanding Debts

**Veronica Mars**

Disclaimer: I don't own VM or its characters.

Author's Note: OK…I know this story has been moving slowly, but we're getting closer to the end. This was a difficult chapter to write, let me know if you like it!

The dreary dawn that Neptune awoke to only deteriorated as the morning wore on. By the time everyone got to the church it was not only rainy and windy, but unseasonably cold as well. Veronica didn't have much to say about the appropriate weather, but Logan mumbled a few curses as he quickly realized that if the rain kept up, the burial would be hell. Not that it wasn't going to be already, but he knew Veronica was going to want to linger until everyone left to say a few last words to Wallace. He also knew she would care less about being wet and cold, not so much because she wanted to make herself sick, but more because he was fairly certain she wouldn't feel it anyway. The same way she didn't feel hunger or exhaustion, or any of those feelings, which by this point should be overpowering her ability to even move. He knew that physical discomfort was meaningless to Veronica at the moment, which meant he and Keith were responsible for fulfilling them, by force if necessary. And Logan did not want to force Veronica away from the graveyard.

"Besides," he mumbled quietly to himself, as they got ready to leave the house, "cold rainy funerals are so clichéd."

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The only indications of the emotions Veronica was feeling were her white fist tightly holding a balled up tissue and the occasional quake her body would make as she tried to hold back her tears. She absolutely refused to let herself cry until after she had given her remarks. Logan didn't quite know how best to help her out, and to be completely honest, was having a hard time holding it together himself. He gently caressed the knuckles holding the tissue, trying to get her to relax just a little. The piece of paper held in her other hand giving him all the reply he needed to understand that relaxation was not much of an option for Veronica at the moment. As the time drew nearer for Veronica to stand in front of her family, her friends, assorted people she hardly knew, strangers and the basketball team complete with many people she strongly disliked, Logan quickly bent over to whisper in her ear,

"Veronica, this is for Wallace, his family, and you. The rest of us don't matter, so when you're up there, if you start to lose it, it's OK. You're not weak, Veronica Mars, everyone who matters knows that."

Veronica gazed at him with watery eyes and whispered quickly to him as she stood up, "I'm OK, Logan" and as she took a deep breath and walked up to the podium, Logan knew she was going to get through this. He knew it because of the same things he had just told her. This was for Wallace, and Veronica wouldn't let herself let him down.

Logan had never been so proud of Veronica as when she gave the eulogy. He watched her brace herself, to try not to seem as vulnerable as she felt. He was almost surprised at how easily she began:

_I owe Wallace a lot of things. I owe him a box of snicker doodles for a favor he did for me last week. I owe him an introduction to a girl I know who was in one of his classes that he thought was 'fly'. I owe him a "thank you" for the countless times he helped me out, a "sorry" for the times I let him down. And I owe him my life for more than one occasion. _

_Wallace not only helped to literally save my life, but he also saved me from myself. When I first met Wallace, I was completely lost and for the most part, alone. I don't know why he decided to stick with me. I was angry and bitter and desperate. Desperate for someone talk to, to be friends with, desperate for some indication that life could someday go back to normal. I needed someone who could tell that inside my cold exterior I truly was still a real live person, with feelings and needs. Wallace got that. He stuck with me in spite of all the secrets I kept, the favors I asked and the crap he got from those around him who didn't understand why he hung out with Veronica Mars. He defended me to strangers, friends and even his family, when it would have been so much easier to bow out. Wallace Fennel was fiercely loyal. To me, to his family and to those he loved. _ Veronica's voice began to quiver and crack._ I wish I had been more appreciative of that when he was alive. I wish I could have once more day with him to tell him how much he meant to me. How much I still need my BFF to remind me that life is worth not just living, but enjoying. How he helped me to appreciate what I have. In a time when so much of my life was consumed with tragedy and betrayal, Wallace reminded me how to smile. He gave me a reason to try and live like a normal teenager again. _

_I owe Wallace a lot of things that I didn't have time to make good on. _Tears began to calmly flow down her face and she didn't make a move to clear them. _So Wallace, I promise you this: I am going to do my best to live my life in a way you would approve of. I want you to be proud of your BFF, and I will try to be half the person you were. And I promise, I will never forget you. I love you and I miss you more than I will ever be able to express now and always. _

With that, Veronica walked slowly, but surely back to her seat. She folded up the eulogy, placed it in her purse and pulled out a clean tissue. Then as Logan wrapped his arm around her shoulders, she leaned into him and let herself cry.

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The ride to the cemetery was oddly peaceful. Keith drove while Veronica and Logan sat in the back seat. They were holding hands, but Veronica was staring quietly out the window, head resting on the glass, watching the rain fall. When the procession turned into the cemetery, Veronica groaned, "I don't want to do this again. It's so unfair." Logan tightened his grip on her hand, but no one in the car had a response.

The burial went by in a blur and before they knew it, people were throwing flowers into Wallace's grave and shaking Alicia's hand mournfully. As Logan expected, Veronica wanted to hold back. While they had been under the cover of a tarp for much of the ceremony, at this point they were standing outside of the shelter, just in front of Wallace's grave. Everyone quickly became soaking wet, and even with Logan's coat over her shoulders, Veronica was shivering with cold. The last guest finally left, and Keith walked with Alicia back to her waiting limo. Veronica somehow convinced Logan to stand back under the tarp while she said her final goodbye. She appreciated Logan's attention and comfort, but this was between her and Wallace. Although Veronica understood Logan's concern for her wellbeing, after all Wallace had done for her, she was not about to let a cold rain keep her from this moment.

So, while Logan sat with his head in his hands, peeking up at a distraught Veronica, Veronica kneeled in the cold mud staring down at the coffin.

"This is so unfair Wallace, and I know you would say something witty and smart if you were here, but there's honestly nothing anyone can say to me that makes this ok. I can usually search and find a reason for death. I wish I could find someone to take the blame. It wouldn't bring you back, but it would give me a purpose to be here when you aren't. I guess I'll need to find another way to cope with your death, but I want you to know: you were the most amazing best friend I could have asked for. I will never forget you and I am forever grateful for the time we had together. Goodbye, Wallace"

With that Veronica's trembling form made its way back to Logan's waiting arms. He couldn't tell if she was shaking from the cold or the tears, but he held her tightly, rubbing her back and rocking gently back and forth.

And that's how Keith found them ten minutes later, when he quietly took Logan's soaked jacket off Veronica's shoulders and replaced it with his own slightly dryer one. Then he gently took Veronica into his own arms and gave Logan the keys to the car, asking him to bring it around. After Logan left, Keith focused his attention on his daughter, who was trying her hardest to pull herself back together.


	8. And the days go by

**Veronica Mars**

Disclaimer: Don't own any of it.

Author's Note: Thanks for all the reviews! This is the last chapter. I hope you all enjoyed it! Not much a plot, but I guess I was trying to figure out what would happen if Veronica just had to cope with something head-on for once, without the distractions of a case surrounding it. I hope you enjoyed it! Let me know and _review_ 

After the funeral Keith suggested that it might be time for Logan to head home for a few days. While Veronica and Logan were slightly annoyed at first, they both agreed a few days apart wouldn't hurt. Neither of them had been sleeping well leading to snappy arguments filled with words they didn't mean and Veronica desperately needed some time to herself to get her feet back on the ground.

The first few nights that Veronica actually got some sleep were rough. She wasn't sure which she hated more: waking up after a good dream, usually somehow including Wallace, just to realize he wasn't here anymore; or the nights she woke up gasping his name, having re-lived his death all over again. However painful, she was once again sleeping mostly through the night, which did make the days a little easier.

The other thing, which was helping a lot, was Logan's insistence that the two of them go out and "live a little" more often. They'd go to the movies, play putt-putt, go to dinner or walk on the beach as often as possible. It wasn't always easy, and there were many days when Veronica longed for Wallace's easy friendship. Not to mention the 101 things an hour, which reminded Veronica of Wallace. Logan was patient with her, and in tune to her feelings and moods, which even she knew, were hard to keep up with these days. Still, as the days went by, life slowly went back to normal.

Before Veronica knew it, a month passed by and Veronica decided to take her first trip to the graveyard since the burial. She didn't tell anyone where she was going; she wanted to have some time alone with Wallace. She missed their BFF bonding time.

There was a slight breeze but the sun beat down brightly on the newly grown grass. Veronica placed a shoebox with a small piece of paper taped to it in front of Wallace's headstone.

_I miss you Wallace, and those words don't even begin to explain it. I miss sitting with you doing nothing, I miss telling you about my adventures and listening to yours. I miss your calm rationality, but most of all, I just miss my best friend. I hope wherever you are, you're happy…and surrounded by girls and basketball. Please look in on me from time to time, and keep an eye out for Lily. I think you two would get along really well. She loved to live life to the fullest…same as you. Enjoy the snicker doodles, and if you're not too much of a wuss, I taped the address of that girl whose phone number you wanted. Seeing as you can't call her, the phone number would be useless, but I'm hoping for your sake that being dead has its perks. Not that I condone this, but maybe you can "peek" in on her from time to time…if you get my drift (blegh!). Anyway, I need to go, or Dad and Logan might send out a search party. I love you BFF and I'll be back to visit soon._

And with that Veronica kissed her hand, touched it lightly to Wallace's headstone and walked off with the sun setting behind her. She felt a little better than when she came. Although Wallace was gone, Veronica realized that she would always be able to talk to him and he would always be there for her. More importantly, Veronica felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude to have known Wallace at all.


End file.
